The Currents of Aftermath

I was down visiting my dad this last week. I started sorting out things of my mother's. Going through drawers, her office and then her closet. I was given the grace to look through things without feeling destroyed with loss. How that happened, I truly do not know. But I was grateful.

I have to relay the contents of this one Birthday card I had sent to my mother in 1978. I understood so deeply when I read this, the amount of distress I caused my mom with my lackadaisical lifestyle. My poor parents had NO idea what to do with me during this time of my life.

Hi there,
How was your trip to Vancouver? Beautiful huh? I'm at Tricia's house now, working for Barb and Ed. I'll be leaving around August 11th to go to Michigan for another music festival and to see my friend Brown. Then possibly, on to New York with Judith, depending on my money.

Its real nice to be some place for awhile and get caught up with my life - absorb my travelling experiences. But the bug is still strong in my, so I'll probably continue moving around for a couple of months. If I can get on a "hoedad" crew, I hope to be tree planting in oregon in the fall. Its excellent money for the hard work, so who knows - I'll keep you posted.

Have a real happy birthday. I'll be thinking of you. Love, Molly

I was telling Dad, "All mom would say to me as she let out a sigh, was, "God, can't you get a nice job in a bank somewhere?" It drove her crazy that I was so unsettled and travelling here and there. She was always grateful when I would settle somewhere. Although, settling in Alaska for five years wasn't quite the idea she was thinking of.

I had such a nice time with my dad. Just watching movies at night with him gave me comfort. Its a new kind of relationship I have with him. One that is so much more present and immediate. I am grateful to feel so close with him.